Off the Booze...For Serious

So I may have gained some weight since moving to LA. And maybe by some I mean 20 pounds. Twenty freaking pounds on short little me, does not make a hot James. No, it in fact makes me want to stick my tongue out at cameras because if I'm going to look fat, I might as well look angry too.

Indeed, James has gotten so pudgy that even Grandpa-pa pulled her aside and said, "I think you need to start watching what you eat."

Tangent - Why is James referring to herself in the third person?

Watch what I eat? WATCH WHAT I EAT?

OK, so my jeans are a little tight, my abs aren't flat, and my ass is grande. (Who am I kidding, my ass has always been grande.) I may have fallen off the gym wagon, but seriously it wasn't walking distance once I moved, and I'm not about to pay $3 to park on the Promenade. Yes, I would pay to park there for shopping, but not sweating.

Let's do the math shall we...If I go to the gym 5 days a week (like I should), how much will I spend per week? Per year?
x = $3 for Promenade Parking
y = $$$ that I can spend on more important things, like new jeans.
v = a varied amount of $$$ I may spend per gym visit at Jamba Juice & Anthropologie
y = 52(5x) + v
y = 260x + v (Yeah, distribution property!)
y = 780 + v
Ok, so $780 a year on parking alone...That's like 4.8 pairs of Joe's Jeans, and not even the ones I like with the trouser pockets. That's not even including the cute Ella Moss and Susana Monaco dresses that I adore at Anthropologie, or the Passion Berry Breeze (with Fiber Boost!) that I will most definitely reward myself with for a sweat well done. Plus another $600 for my membership. Essentially, I saved myself over $1400 a year by quitting the gym. Go me!

No booze for serious, at least until J's parents come for Thanksgiving...